Just a little of me...

Confession: Music plays a major part in my life...it completely affects my mood/attitude/outlook/thought life and so much more.

I deny this every time I turn on something I shouldn't be listening to. I tell myself that it doesn't affect me like it does other ppl, and that if I'd just practice I could control its affects anyway.

Lies.

Even if that were true, why would I want to "control" that? Its not control, its called desensitizing myself. Yeah, great goal to set Tiffany...

So for the last several weeks I've had a clean music life. In fact all I've listened to is Christian. My outlook is so much better, I'm excited about God and ministry, and what's in store for me. School still bums me out a bit every now and then, but my focus is so much more positive. Amazing. No not really, just obvious.

I want to invest in a CD player for my car...know why? Cause I find that it's easiest for me to mess up and struggle with my music while I'm driving. I flip to old familiar radio stations and hear songs I like/liked and its hard. I torment myself w/fire.

Which actually makes me think of that that scene in Fireproof were he trashes out the computer. He knew that just "steering clear" of it wasn't going to cut it. I don't think just not listening to those stations is going to last forever. I like to think I'm strong enough, but that's my problem right there.

At this point I'd like to have the radio out of my car. See, thankfully I haven't wanted to put money into the music I'm talking about struggling with, so as far as CD's go I'm "on my napkin". (That just means that I'm staying in the musical space God's allowing me...)Anyway, if you know where to get/or have a relatively nice, yet reasonably priced car CD player, let me know.

This was just on my chest and I thought I'd get it off...feel free to check up on me and ask how I'm doing. I'd like that extra nudge. Oh, and more than that, pray for me. Thanks!